My Journey Veiling at Mass: Part 3!

Note: The Catholic Church's stance on head covering is that it is not required but is permitted as a personal devotion.  This series of posts is not suggesting it is required in any way and is only my personal experience with head covering.

You can read Part 1 and Part 2 of my veiling journey.

The Art of Veiling

So here I am, several months later, with my rush ordered infinity veil and the veil I won from the contest, both of which I have used regularly.

I ordered the infinity veil, and now it was time to wear it.  I was very very nervous the first day I wore a veil to Mass, but I have to admit it was a weekday Mass so it seemed a bit less stressful for some reason.  I don't know why because having LESS people at Mass seems like I would have stood out more than having more people at Mass.  I suppose I felt that the fewer people were there, the fewer opportunities there would be for me to be judged by others.  Can you tell I was EXTREMELY NERVOUS?!!!!

With butterflies in my stomach, shaking hands, and weak knees, I entered the church with my boys, slipped into one of the back pews, hidden, safe.  Let me tell you, when you have a 5 year old and a 9 month old, there is no place you can hide in church where their little voices will not result in looks of other parishioners.  So safety was out.  Now it was just time to "get through this Mass".  At least that is what I thought.  Then something pretty awesome happened.

My Zen Place

It was only through the grace of the Holy Spirit, but as Mass began I become so calm, serene.  It was as if the veil was blocking all the distractions from ME!  I didn't seem to be a distraction to others and they were no longer a distraction for me.  I could focus on the Mass with as much focus as a mother of two busy boys can.  Truly, it was a beautiful experience for me!  During the Eucharistic prayer, I just felt like I was making my Guardian Angel so proud because here I am, worshiping with "the angels" (as St. Paul tells us), while honoring my Lord with my head covered.  Here I am for the first time, maybe the first time ever, truly keeping in mind, that I am IN the PRESENCE of Jesus' body, blood, soul and divinity!  How unworthy I am to receive this gift, but oh how beautiful a gift it is!

I had found my place of zen, my place with my Lord and I could not go back.

Tears of Joy

So it's been several months of veil wearing for all Masses I have attended (Sundays and weekdays) and I don't feel out of place one bit. In fact, the more I attend Mass, the more I know I am doing what the Lord is calling me to do.  I am not saying this is for everyone or that everyone should follow suit.  This is what He is asking of me and I am so very happy to oblige.

In fact, it seems the more I "veil up" (ha!), the more I seem to get out of the Eucharistic prayer, the more I feel my Lord and unfortunately (or maybe fortunately I'm not sure), the more emotional I become in the presence of the body of Christ.  I find myself tearing up and even crying many times in Mass after I have received Christ for no real reason, other than I am just so very grateful for this wonderful blessed gift, this perpetual sacrifice.  Maybe it is the Holy Spirit touching my heart or it's just the way my brain is able to understand the Eucharist at this time, but it truly is a blessing and I have only my veil and my Lord to thank!

So that has been my journey of veiling these past few months.  Do you veil?  Have you thought of doing it?  What's been your experience?

Blessings to you and yours.  And if you wear a head covering in the presence of our Lord, let me just say "Veil on, Ladies!  Veil on!",

My Journey Veiling at Mass: Part 2!

Note: The Catholic Church's stance on head covering is that it is not required but is permitted as a personal devotion.  This series of posts is not suggesting it is required in any way and is only my personal experience with head covering.

Read part 1 here.

God Brought Me To It

What was I to do with this old tradition of head covering in Mass?  Where did it come from?  Why did women originally veil or cover their heads?  Why did we stop?  Why had I not been taught about this tradition?   I know the Catholic Church does not create random traditions, so I knew there had to be a theological explanation for it.  I didn't know what it was, or why I, for some inexplicable reason, HAD to find out.

After attending Mass for a few months, I began to really contemplate veiling.  Why couldn't I get this interest out of my mind?  Was the Lord calling me to find out more about this theology and possibly requesting this of me?

I know the power of prayer and I know the Lord will make His wants known to me as soon as I open myself up to it.  And so, after a few more months, I, bravely (yes I use the word bravely, b/c I think anytime we open ourselves to God's will we become the bravest versions of ourselves), said "Lord, if you want me to veil, you are going to have to bring me to it."  Oh be careful what you ask for my friends!

The Email

The VERY NEXT DAY after I prayed that prayer, in my inbox sat an email from a fellow parishioner offering to give away her extra veils to anyone who was interested.  Talk about an answer to prayer, huh?!

Unfortunately, I responded too late and all veils were already given out but the result yielded a wonderful dialogue about veiling and I was referred to a number of resources including this book to learn more about the theology behind this tradition.  In my search for more information, I also stumbled across this fantastic blog post regarding the scriptural basis for head covering.  For the first time in my life, I FINALLY understood what St. Paul was saying to the Corinthians about this and it made SO MUCH SENSE!  So, that evening, I rush ordered myself this veil in a lilac color.

The Giveaway

Around this same time but before I ordered my own veil, I had entered a giveaway from a company who made chapel veils.  They were offering 10 people a chance to win their own veil.  Of course there were over 1000 entries but I entered anyway.  I thought, why not?  If God wants me to veil, well He will bring me to it.

Wouldn't you know, I was one of the 10 lucky winners?  YEP so in the span of TWO DAYS of my prayer, I missed out on a free offer of veils from another parishioner just to randomly win a brand new veil of my choice from this company (which is wonderful by the way).

Waving the White Flag

I could deny it no longer, the Lord was in fact bringing me to head covering and it was my turn to wave the white flag and surrender to His will.

Oh how nervous I was!  How will I look?  What will people think?  People will think that I think "I'm so holy" and that's so far from the truth.  I will be completely humiliated.  Then I heard these words (in my head of course) "Maria, can you not endure some humiliation for me?".  Touche' God, touche'!  This girl is going to "veil up"!

Check out my veiling experiences in Part 3 of this series.

Blessings to you and yours,

My Journey Veiling at Mass: Part 1!

Note: The Catholic Church's stance on head covering is that it is not required but is permitted as a personal devotion.  This series of posts is not suggesting it is required in any way and is only my personal experience with head covering.


If you read my book review on The Chapel Veil: Symbol of the Spouse of Christ than you have already heard a little bit about my journey to veil at Mass.  Here is the unabridged version.

Introduction to Veiling

I have a few scattered memories of my grandmother placing a scarf over her head when she entered a Catholic church many many years ago.  I was very small and did not seem to understand why she did this nor did it occur to me to ask.  Therefore, I suppose it makes sense that I didn't seem to truly notice when or why she stopped donning her head with a cover at Mass.  Yet, for some reason, it ceased.

In that time since, I have been inundated with the classic falsehood that "the church" no longer requires veiling or head coverings because they no longer see women as submissive to men.  Therefore, when I went to Catholic elementary school, I was not introduced to this tradition.  As I grew up, I never really thought about veiling.  I saw pictures and video of women from other countries covering their heads when participating in Papal Masses but never thought about why they continued to do so, or why we in America did not.

It wasn't until I moved to the parish I am now currently a parishioner, did I come face to face with veiling once again.  I noticed it immediately when I walked into this church our first Sunday there.  One lonely woman, with a veil, seated up front.  The next week I saw two women with veils, then three, scattered around the church.  My, aren't we "holier than thou"! How they must think themselves so very "holy" compared to the rest of us women who attend with bare heads (cue eye roll)!  Yet I was strangely drawn to them.

For reasons still unknown to me, and in which I chalk up to an interior calling of the Holy Spirit, I had to watch these women in church.  I couldn't take my eyes off of them.  They dressed modestly, mostly in skirts and dresses knee-length or longer.  They bowed or genuflected reverently prior to receiving the Blessed Eucharist and they seemed to be in their own little world, as if not distracted by all the sounds and sights I seemed to be during Mass.  What was it about these veils and why am I so drawn to them?  I had to ask myself.  Once I noticed these women, those scattered memories of my early childhood vaguely came back to me.

This was introduction to veiling as an adult.  Now what was I going to do with this...this veiling thing?

Next week I'll have Part 2 to my Veiling Journey!  :)

Blessings to you and yours,

A Mother's Lesson in Mercy!

Today, our Lord taught me a very important lesson about mercy.  I've been devoted to the Divine Mercy Chaplet and Novena for many years now and I "know" (meaning I recognize with my thinking but not always truly feel or understand) that Jesus is there simply waiting to dole out His mercy upon us if we just ask.  Oh, but how easy it is to forget the second step in the "mercy process".  In the Our Father we are reminded "Forgive us our trespasses AS WE FORGIVE THOSE who tresspass against us."  At the end of the Divine Mercy Chaplet there is a beautiful prayer that states:  "Eternal God, in whom mercy is endless and the treasury of compassion inexhaustible, look kindly upon us and increase your mercy toward us so that in difficult moments we will not despair nor become despondent but with great confidence submit ourselves to your holy will, which is love and mercy itself."  Yes we are most definitely expected to participate fully in step two, sharing that mercy with others.

You may be asking yourself, "Ok so what does all that have to do with the lesson you learned today, Maria?".  Well, sometimes I forget that the people who need my love and mercy the most are the ones who are the closest to me, my family.

This week has been a rough "listening week", to say the least, for my oldest, Pickle.  Let's just say, this week he has been really showing his independent thinking by trying to respond to my directions with his own actions.  The problem with this is that many times five year old thinking does not take into account consequences and safety the way a parent's mind does.  Yet it is through this very struggle that we both learned a priceless lesson.

Today, Pickle was playing with his younger brother, little Bean, when he decided it was a good idea to run around the kitchen pushing Bean's walker and slamming it in the walls.  I told Pickle several times to stop doing this as he was going to hurt himself or Bean.  Sometimes, I guess lessons are learned best through experience.  Within seconds of my third explanation (like a good mother, providing rationale and reason for the what's and why's of my directives), I hear a great BANG and Pickle immediately begins to scream and cry "I broke the walker!".  I turned around and all I see is blood everywhere!  Pickle was in shock that he broke his brother's toy that he hadn't even noticed he was hurt.

Sidenote: Anyone who knows me, knows I am NOT good in emergency situations.  I tend to freeze completely or scream when I see the sight of blood.  But something happened inside of me in that moment.  I was absolutely calm.  It was as if I was moving in slow motion and my thoughts became crystal clear: 1) find the source of the bleeding, 2) stop the bleeding, 3) determine the severity of the injury, 4) remain calm so Pickle can calm down as well.  I KNOW?!  This is definitely not me.  It was as if I was a different person, someone possessed, going through these motions only through the grace of God, I can assure you!

Quickly, I took Pickle's hand, sat him on the kitchen counter next to the sink, grabbed a handful of wet paper towels and dabbed the blood away.  It continued to gush down his throat, in his mouth, all over his teeth, I just couldn't figure out where it was coming from.  Finally, I was able to stop the bleeding long enough to see there were three sources from which it was comine, his top lip was split, his chin was scratched several times, and underneath his chin there was a deeper cut where most of the blood was gushing forth.  Within a few minutes the bleeding was stopped and I was able to really assess Pickle.  He was scared but he was just fine (Thank you Pickle's Guardian Angel!).  Nothing a little cold compress and a few band-aids couldn't fix.  Little Bean was just fine too (Thank you Bean's Guardian Angel!).

Yet, Pickle could not calm down.  He was so devastated the he broke his brother's toy he couldn't stop crying or breathe.  This was the moment, I felt the Lord teaching me a lesson.  As much as I wanted to yell and scream that I am so tired of telling you to follow my directions the first time they are given and this is what you get when you don't listen to mom and so on and so forth,  it was like the Holy Spirit spoke to me.  In that moment, only one word came to my mind "mercy, mercy, mercy".  This is what the Lord was asking of me.  Have mercy on Pickle in this moment.  He has learned his lesson the hard way.  Now is not the time for a lecture but the time for mercy.  The time to show my son that no toy is more valuable than the love I have for him and no action he could ever do, would diminish that love.

With those words on my heart, I spent the next half hour loving him and explaining to him gently that no matter what choices he makes (good or bad) I will always love him, and just like Jesus forgives us for our mistakes, so I forgive him for his.  Of course, once he realized he had to eventually tell Dad what happened after he gets home from work today, a new torrent of tears came streaming down his cheeks.  Oh how I wished at that moment I could take away his anguish!  I wanted desperately to offer to call my husband for him and to explain everything but again the Holy Spirit spoke "mercy" and I understood.  As hard as it would be for me to see him worry about having to admit his mistake to his father, I also knew that it was something for which he MUST take responsibility.  If I stepped in now, I would be doing him a greater disservice, and taking some of the real life-lesson out of this moment.  I realized that sometimes, having mercy is consciously choosing to do the most difficult thing of all, watch your child struggle.  This too is a great mercy as I am teaching my child that with every choice he makes there is a consequence, sometimes good, sometimes bad.  With every consequence, he must take responsibility for those actions.  What a hard lesson for a five year old to learn!  But if not now, then when?  And in what higher-stakes situation?

Sometimes having mercy on our loved ones means we will have to watch them suffer for the sake of learning a bigger lesson.  Sometimes, having mercy means we too will suffer with them.  I think I may finally understand, on a very very small scale, how Jesus feels watching us make mistakes.  How He LONGS for us to make the right choice but how He knows the consequences of our actions will help us to learn the tough lessons of life and that maybe, just maybe He too suffers along with us all because He wishes to grant us the most wonderful gift of all...mercy!  

Blessing to you and your and may mercy be flowing from you today and everyday!

Book Review: The Chapel Veil!

I just finished reading this very quick booklet titled The Chapel Veil: Symbol of the Spouse of Christ, which consists of two short essays written by Elizabeth Black and Emily Sparks.  I became interested in the theology behind "the veil" when I noticed a few women veiling at Mass.  I have not been exposed to much veiling previously, so as an adult to see a re-emergence of "veiling" was quite intriguing to me.  I, for reasons I can only attribute to the Holy Spirit, was drawn to these women and their exercise of veiling in Mass, however I had no understanding of the purpose or symbolism behind this tradition.


I suspect most of us are familiar with the scriptural basis for this tradition explained by St. Paul in Corinthians however we lack a true understanding of the context in which this chapter was written.   I have found a beautiful explanation here for this bible passage that makes much sense to me.  Again, I suspect, most of us were told since veiling was no longer required under the 1983 Canon Law, it was no longer necessary or we were indoctrinated with a terrible falsehood, that veiling was an outward sign of subordination to man, which is FAR from the truth!  Whether veiling be of necessity or not, I believe Mother Church, in her wisdom, provides each woman with the choice to decide this for herself.  Yet, what I needed to understand was, what this veil tradition was all about?  Why did it begin and why did the church require this tradition for 2000+ years before leaving it up to each woman to decide for herself?

By divine grace, I somehow became acquainted with a woman who veiled and suggested I order this booklet to learn more about the theology behind veiling. Upon reading it, I have come to realize the true beauty behind this tradition.  I recommend anyone who is interested in understanding the theology behind veiling, order this booklet and learn about this tradition for themselves.

I cannot stress this enough, that the reasons for veiling has NOTHING to do with submission to man and EVERYTHING to do with honoring our Lord.  So if you feel so inclined, click on the link above and learn about the symbolic and theological reasons for veiling!

This booklet is short, sweet, to the point and affordable.  The essays are easy to read and comprehend.  Within a few minutes, you will come to understand the reasons women all over the world continue to participate in this beautiful tradition!

I give it:  4 "Chaotic" Stars

Blessings to you and yours,

Getting Your Kids to Say the Rosary!

Padre Pio said "The rosary is the weapon for these times".  I believe this is true.  Not only do I want my children to grow up loving our Blessed Mother but I want them to be prepared to face the evils of this world.  And there are very real evils out there. 

Saint Paul reminds us in Ephesians that the real danger comes not from this world when he says: "Finally, draw your strength from the Lord and from his mighty power.  Put on the armor of God so that you may be able to stand firm against the tactics of the devil.  For our struggle is not with flesh and blood but with the principalities, with the powers, with the world rulers of this present darkness, with the evil spirits in the heavens." (Eph 6:10-13)

 Therefore, I want my children to learn how they can put on their armor and I can do this by teaching them the rosary.  In order to do this, I needed to answer this one very important question "How can I get my child to say the rosary?".  Here are a few ideas that have worked for us:

1.) The Lacing Rosary

If you have children like my Pickle than you are probably trying to figure out how to teach the rosary while keeping your child's attention.  So I looked on the internet for some resources and found this super cute lacing rosary from Catholic Inspired (it's awesome!).  But who ever said I had to use it just for lacing?  Here are few different ways we have used this rosary.

We've used pom poms to count the "Hail Mary" beads!

We've also used paperclips as counters!  Check out the finished product.  Looks pretty good.

I've even put these rosary papers inside a sheet protector and let Pickle use dry erase markers to color in each bead as he says it.

2.) The Paper Bag Rosary Booklet

But we couldn't just stick to one type of rosary as it could get pretty boring after a while.  So the second rosary idea I saw on the net came from Catholic Icing's paper bag rosary booklets.  I simply adapted it to fit Pickle's preferences and style. 

After grabbing some brown paper bags and stapling them together, I found a few sheets of card stock (the only colors I had left were pink and off white) that I used for the mysteries insert.

For each mystery picture I printed out an extra copy of the Catholic Inspired's lacing rosary (the 4 in 1) and cut out the pictures and glued them to the card stock. 

I know my son, and I know he needs to do something to mark off each "Hail Mary" he says or he struggles to pay attention.  In addition, I notice if he isn't counting the beads he tends to think each decade is longer than they actually are and becomes discouraged.  I then placed a simple strip of boxes next to each picture to represent the 10 "Hail Mary" beads of each decade.  I covered the card stock with contact paper so we could use dry erase markers and reuse the page as often as we would like.  

I didn't make a box or marker for the "Our Father", "Glory Be" or the "Oh My Jesus" prayers but if I had a chance to do it over again, I certainly would because he wants to mark something for every prayer.  Our current compromise is that he underlines the mystery picture to signify the recitation of the "Our Father" but does not currently mark the "Glory be" or "Oh My Jesus" prayers in anyway.

I quickly printed out copies of the other prayers and glued into the booklet so as Pickle gets older he can refer to them at any time.

3.)  The "Jumping Rosary"

Some days Pickle is constantly moving so I needed a way he could get the sensory input he needed while still praying to our Blessed Lady.  So we made the "Jumping Rosary".  The "Jumping Rosary" can be executed a few different ways:

1.) Place large pieces of paper on the floor numbered 1-10 and have your child jump in order up to 10 marking each "Hail Mary" as it is being said.  Return to start and begin again for next decade.

Or

2.)  Place large pictures representing each mystery of the rosary around your house/yard.  Put adequate space between each picture and have your child jump only when saying "Hail Mary", so that your child reaches the picture representation of the mystery by the 10th "Hail Mary".

4.)  Praying in Public

Nature Walks

Praying in public is a very easy way to incorporate movement while praying which helps to keep Pickle engaged for the entire rosary.  Pickle and I pray often while taking walks in our neighborhood or on nature trails with Little Bean in the stroller.  It's a nice way to get some fresh air and enjoy God's beautiful creation while praying to our Holy Mother.  

Shrines and Statues

Another thing Pickle really enjoys is to pray outside in front of statues of Mary.  We have a grotto at our church of Our Lady of Guadalupe.  Pickle asks to go visit "Mary" there and we have said several family rosaries there after mass or confession on beautiful days.  We have also said rosaries in front of statues at local shrines as well.  My best tip when making trips to shrines with little ones is to be sure to pack enough food and drink for the trip.  As long as Pickle is well fed and not thirsty, he very much enjoys visiting shrines and praying in public.

What's the best part about praying the rosary in public?  It is possible to receive a plenary indulgence doing so.  So, "do not be afraid" my friends.  Just stay calm and pray the rosary! ;)

   

So what is the BEST way to get my child/children to pray the rosary?  My best advice would be to think about what your child/children enjoy or do best and use those strengths or interests to your advantage.  You can still teach your child the reverence of prayer, just without all the power struggles.  Work smarter, not harder.  At least that's what "they" say!

Do you have any interesting ideas or ways you pray the rosary with your children?  Please share your great ideas below.

Blessings to you and yours,

Catholic Tidbit: Works of Mercy!

Here's a quick Catholic Tidbit!  Remember way back when you were getting ready to be confirmed and you talked about the Corporal and Spiritual Works of Mercy?  Are you scratching your head, trying to recall what they are?  Well here's a little reminder.

Blessings to you and yours,